Anorexia and Christianity

Hey Guys, it’s Char! How are you! It’s been a long time and I apologise for that!

I wanted to write this blog about my experience with an Eating disorder as a Christian. This can be such a taboo subject in religious communities but it really shouldn’t be so I am here to shed some light on this topic. I talked about this on my Instagram but by recommendation, I decided to do a more detailed blog on here.

As some of you guys now, I was diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa, a restrictive eating disorder, when I was 12 years old, 6 months after I joined my current church. My church youth leaders were indeed the first people to realise I was struggling with an Ed, however, I hoped against hope that no one else would find out. I felt so ashamed. So ungodly. And it really hindered my recovery after hospital.

Some of my previous youth leaders ridiculed me for asking questions and opening up about so called taboo subjects that I have experienced or have been wondering about. This led my mindset to become secretly curious and also distressing. Therefore, I still struggle to open up to church goers, even though I trust them.

There is a controversial myth that an eating disorder is a sin to many, many people in these communities. Whilst this is most probably false teaching, it really, really hurt me as a Christian. Not only had I just got out of hospital, I was a healthy weight and I felt like a fake, adding more to the feeling of invalidity in my disorder.

Eating disorders are NOT US. They are extremely addictive,almost like a drug and lust for control. Illness is not a sin and an ED Is an illness, not a choice. Therefore, it is not ok to do someone over in the context of sin just because they have an ED.

Jesus paid the price for all illness, all sin, of all time, just the once on the cross.

Once I realised this, I began to heal. I began to open up more, even sharing a deeply personal testimony at my baptism. By no means am I saying I am 100% healed or that it’s easy, but Jesus is my foundation and he will carry you while you work things out.

 

Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you[a] free from the law of sin and death.

Romans 8;1-2

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Feel free to check out this post on my Instagram @positivelycharlotte.

God bless and keep safe,

Lotts xx

10 tips for New Christians; 1 Gal’s advice

Hey Guys, long time no post! I can genuinely say that i have missed this blogging fiasco! so I know some of you guys have just become a Christian or are pondering your faith, while Its great to find that your slate has been wiped clean in Jesus, You may be feeling unsure of how to begin your crazy journey with him. But don’t worry baby girl/boy. I got your back. Being only 14 years old, I’m still learning as I’m sure I will be for a long while,  but heres my tips for baby Christians which will hopefully ease your “God Anxiety”

Get a bible!;Ok so this may seem really obvious but immersing yourself in Gods world will change you from the inside out so it is essential to grab yourself a bible (Or multiple like ya girl) that works for you. For some, Its Little pocket Bibles, bible in a year, Journaling bibles. Everyone is different so don’t be afraid to hunt around to find what works for you.

Listen to Christian/Gospel music “- Don’t worry guys, I am not suggesting  you get rid of your 1,00000 song rap playlist. If that speaks to you, no one is going to take that away from you, but Christian and Gospel music has been my biggest stepping stone into heart to heart worship. Discovering which music works for you can be overwhelming at first but don’t worry if gospel music doesn’t speak to you straight away. It’s ok. It’s Ok. I feel you. Ride the wave. Ride the wave…

Don’t expect to be healed overnight- Ok so, I know in movies, people get healed straight away with only one word. That’s not necessarily true. I know people who have been healed like this and if you have, great. If you haven’t, also great. Chances are, healing doesn’t happen over night. But take heart. If God wants it to happen, Itll happen. In the mean time, lean in to him babe.

Don’t hold back from asking questions”- It can feel daunting ask Elders in a church a seemingly obvious questions but it doesn’t have to be like that, I promise. Contary to popular belief, there is no such thing as a stupid question and every one in your church or youth group is still learning. You’ll never know everything. That’s totally ok. Don’t be ashamed. It’s OK.

Tell your friends about your faith- I know It may seem scary to open up but I know I wanted to tell the world and his wife about the good things Jesus has done both in my life and others. You may not be like me. You might be anxious, nervous, have social anxiety. It’s ok to be nervous but I’m telling you babe, It’s the best thing I’ve ever done. So take a leap, Go get em girl/boy.

Your story/testimony matters- Your story matters babe, It really does. Don’t hide. Don’t dim your light. Every testimony of faith matters. Wether you’re out saving the world or sitting at home watching Netflix, Your story matters. Period.

start small; There is no shame in admitting that you are overwhemed with all this “God stuff”. It’s ok to start small. If you wanna go all out straight away and go on a mission to Africa, Do it. If you want to go to one youth/bible group a week. That’s ok. Start small. Don’t feel pressured into doing anything you don’t feel ready to do.

Find what worship means to you- Worship means different things to every Christian in the world. Just because something works for your Youth Pastor who moved to America, your mum or that loud kid in your Youth group (AKA me), doesn’t mean it will work for you. You are you, not someone else.

Start a prayer Journal- These are so useful and i would recommend it 3000000 percent. Use it how you wish and I hope you get as much out of them as I do!

Enjoy it! Your faith is a journey that will be filled with doubts and tribulations, yes, but that should not have the power to stop you from loving this crazy, life changing journey that we call faith. So be encouraged, Have fun and don’t do anything I wouldn’t do! (JKS)

 

My lovelies, I hope this helped you in some way! Let me know what else you wanna see!!

God bless,

Char xx

 

 

 

How I came To God- My Faith story 🌷🌷

Hiya Lovelies,

As a young kid, I remember being dragged to church every Easter and Christmas; always singing the same monotonous hymn from the same hymn sheet. Occasionally I would end up playing Mary in a school production of the Nativity in which i sat in a dutty costume with a blue towel over my head with a fake doll (they couldn’t even get the gender right so I assumed Baby Jesus was trans from birth, easy mistake right)?No?Ok then..

I had always thought that God was boring, dull and uninteresting, that The Bible was all a load of Codswallop that could never be applied to my life; after all who could apply the words of a book dating back 2700 years old at age 9?If you could get through those passages at a young age unlike me, I applaud you. I really, Really do.

At age 10, I remember stepping back into a church. I felt like I was treading on Eggshells, that it was all conditional and bounded by rules. I felt as though I had no freedom of speech, that every question was burning my insides; waiting to be asked but never feeling free enough to even open my mouth. By the end of the year, I had fully given up my idea of ever finding a faith. Having a hope for my future, Just as the scriptures said. I believed it Wasn’t true. Like everything was forced. Faith for me at this time was unimaginable.

After stewing these ideas for just under a year, At the end of Primary School, I distinctly remember my mum telling me about this church, which happens to be my current second home, New Life. After mum expressing a wish to go and her pestering me for weeks, I reluctantly got in the car on Rainy Sunday Morning and went. As I stepped inside, Everyone was praying and singing praise and I immediately felt as though a hole inside  me had been filled, all my previous feelings dissolved in love. After only a few weeks, New Life felt like my second home and I knew I had to Pursue a faith yet again.

A few fleeting months later, At only 12 years old, I began Struggling with an undiagnosed eating disorder, Body Dismorphia, Anxiety and depression. I felt ashamed. So, so ashamed. As though God hated me and everyone else did to. After all was it so ungodly I would be kicked out of the church I called mine? Things got so bad I ended up in Hospital after being diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa, just 2 weeks before. I distanced myself from God. I believed he wanted nothing to do with me. That I could never come back to him.

After a near death experience at age 13, I began to slowly wrap my head around the Bible again, believing that it was my only hope. As I read, God started speaking to me, telling me that by faith he could heal and how precious I was. More precious than Rubies. At this realisation, I began to put everything I had into recovery in the hope I would make it back to God and Church, to put all this behind me.

When I was discharged from hospital, God had made it clear to me that I needed to get Baptised. Still unsure, I began to reach out to my amazing youth team and we prayed. At a youth service that night, I knew what I had to do. At this realisation I began to cry and thought “Yes God, I will do it!I will do it”

I was baptised by my Amazing Babe of a Youth Pastor Rae Hicks in front of the church on the 28/10/2018 and since then I have never looked back. Through the trials and the change, relapses and tribulations and doubts, I am becoming stronger in who God believes I am and I want to inspire people in both recovery and faith, from here onwards.My Journey is continuous and although it’s a struggle, I have God on my side now. Hope, faith and Most of all, Life!

Yet what we suffer now, is nothing compared to the glory he will reveal to us Later

Romans 8;8

Big Love,

Char x

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